The Four Agreements for the Holidays
The holidays are coming at us quickly! Whereas summer is about the great outdoors, this time of year starts to get busy with indoor things. We turn inward and get ready to celebrate with friends and family.
This can be such an exciting time and it can also be stressful. Whenever humans get together, especially when there is bustle and preparation and lots of expectation involved, we often bump against each other and times that could be full of warmth become marked by hurt feelings, isolation, and anxiety.
You may have read or heard about the enormously popular book by don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements. In this book, he outlines four incredibly simple principles to help us treat each other with honesty, respect, and freedom.
- 1. Be impeccable with your word.
- 2. Don’t take anything personally.
- 3. Don’t make assumptions.
- 4. Always do your best.
Millions of people around the world use these ideas in their lives every day, and I think that practicing them during the holidays can relieve so much pressure. They can allow us to truly enjoy ourselves—and each other.
Imagine what would happen if you approach the holiday gathering that has potential for stress and anxiety with these in mind.
If I am faced with a family or social dynamic that has become difficult for some reason and makes me dread even showing up, what if I take a moment and remind myself that I’m going to:
- Be honestly myself and genuinely curious about other people
- Let others experience me and not try to control their stories or thoughts about me
- Give them the benefit of the doubt about their intentions and be clear in communicating my needs
- Do my best to show up with kindness and honesty in every situation
With these in mind, it seems like the holiday season and all of the many ways we spend time together could become peaceful. It seems like the events can become important ways to nourish each other with the human connection we all need so much in our busy world.
I’m going to set an intention to use these simple practices at home and in my business. It seems like one way to make the world a better place without needing any extra money or any elaborate planning. Have any thoughts about this? I’d love to hear them. Please feel free to drop me a note or call.
As always, please keep me in mind when your friends or family mention that it might be time to think about a new home or needs advice with their finances. Your referrals are the lifeblood of my business!